Cleaning up...one step at a time

I am always a mess. And I think that is why my home is always such a mess. Allow me to explain.

I work so hard to clean up around here,I just barely make a dent in things. It sucks. I have so much trouble just executing a plan. My body is so physically tired that my brain becomes retarded and I cannot formulate a way to clean up.  

What's sad is that all the mess is probably just making me even more retarded. Everyone needs some sense of "feng shui"or whatever it is that makes people feel like the their homes (and their lives) are in balance.

I do have to wonder if there is a correlation between a home in turmoil and a life in turmoil. If my home was neat and orderly, would I maybe have a better life? I understand that correlation does not always equal causation. But I do sometimes wonder if some of my mental fog is caused by the disorder of my living situation.

The dream of a futon

One of the things that I wanted to go with my typewriter is a futon. Why? you might ask. Simple. It is so simple to lay on a floor typing on a typewriter. Who wants a typewriter in bed with them? A tiny futon with a small coffee table nearby to put the typewriter on is perfect. I love it. And it is perfect to accommodate my Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Sometimes I just need to lay down for a bit, so this makes it easier for me to sit up, type, and then lay down for a bit when I'm too exhausted to continue sitting.

Also, I do not need a bed in my tiny studio. It looks so much nicer and less crowded to have that little futon instead of a bed.

Now, all I need is the typewriter. It's coming down the pipe.

The dream of a typewriter

I have a dream of a typewriter. I was lamenting how I simply cannot afford a laptop to type on while I am lounging in bed (I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome so that happens quite a lot). So, I went on my trusty computer and drooled over unaffordable laptops on Amazon.com. I simply don't have the cash for any extras. Even a decade old, dumb refurbished laptop would be too much.

But then, I typed in the search words "word processor." A word processor is something from my youth. They are dinosaurs that have since died out from the meteor showers of computers featuring awesome Word programs. Because these computers and their programs keep getting better and better, and keep coming faster and harder, the poor word processors have been pummeled into near oblivion.

However, a few of these dinosaurs still lurk in hidden corners of the planet (and on Amazon.com). They are now called electronic typewriters. In fact, if you type in word processor on Amazon, what you will find are a variety of Word programs for sale. There is also one real word processor device that has no ability to print, but that's not what I was interested in.

It was the electronic typewriters that caught my fancy. Everyone has seen the romantic images of a writer typing on a typewriter. It is such a heroic process. It i t sn'like on a computer where you can save and edit as you will. No. A typewriter takes a lot of love to work with. You type and it prints. Voila. No going back. You punch the keys with conviction and it gives you your words on white piece of paper.

Now, and electronic typewriter is not an old fashioned typewriter. They have tiny LCD screens that show a line of words words  before printing. They also have spell check and even a dictionary. But that whole idea of typing out my words and just having it instantly printed out for me was an exciting thought. Part of the problem with typing on a computer is that you cannot just read through your work like a book. Turning the pages is so essential to me when reviewing work that is more than just a page. For a whole novel, in order to make it work and edit appropriately, I really need to see the words in my hands. I think that is why I wrote my first novel at 17 by hand and then typed it up. I really need to just peruse it, flipping between the pages, editing as needed or coming up with new ideas.

Whoever thought that I would want a typewriter more than a laptop.

Writing a novel requires dedication

The title of my post says it all. I want to write a novel soooo badly, but I am not always good at persevering. And I do try to give myself a deadline. That deadline is the end of November. And what is so special about November? Natonal Novel Writing Month (NanoWriMo)! Yep. My way of doing it is beginning the story earlier in the year. Then, in November, I do some hardcore typing. I wrote one novel in this way. I wanted to do this again last year, but I just wasn't feeling well and my brain was drained. So, I am hoping that this year will be better.

I have already started the story, but sitting at a desk and typing is the hardest thing on the planet for me. I want to just lay in bed, get distracted, and then type as I will. It's just too bad that my laptop is busted. They are perfect for that kind of thing.

In the meantime, I will blog more. That will keep me in writing mode, and I will find it easier to commit the act of putting my thoughts to computer screen.

Of course I could always just write a novel the old fashioned way (pen to paper). But it's just so much easier to edit when you are typing.

Still, that is a different and slower way of doing things....The act of putting pen to paper and writing something by hand requires slower processing and--perhaps--could be better for my endeavor in the long run.

Maybe I shall try that.

Showstopper

I love writing about the bizarre...so of course that means I am now writing about the Kardashians.

I was watching the teaser for Kourtney and Kim Take Miami. They were playing the song Showstopper, by Brandon and Leah. It's a sexy song, and as it plays we see Kim swimming underwater in her bikini and Kourtney tanning on a sun chair by the pool Kim is in. We are supposed to be thinking, These girls are showstoppers.

But why are they showstoppers? Why are their step brother Brandon and his wife Leah, the duo who made the song, not the showstoppers? Kim and Kourtney, hanging in bikinis....this should make for some good TV. Are we supposed to be anticipating only the bikinis? Maybe we can hope for some more talented Brandon and Leah songs...

I guess what nags me is the fact that Kourtney and Kim don't bring something special to the table. At least in my mind. They are not talented musicians or scientists working on interesting stem cell research that could change health care forever. They hang out in bikinis and extraordinarily expensive clothing. Perhaps we are supposed to be drawn to the fact that they are talented business women who own the Dash stores? But they are not advertised in the teaser as business women...they are portrayed as half naked women.

The cult of the personality should not make a showstopper of Kourtney and Kim. Showstoppers stop a show because they bring something very special to the table. They turn heads, and it should not be because they are in bikinis. It should be because they made that awesome bikini. Looking good can carry a show. But to stop a show...that takes innovation. You have to change the rules of the game and create a new one. Going along with it and moving it forward is the opposite of being a show stopper.

Barack Obama: Vampire Hunter

Because I have decided that I do not care about politics, and only care about vampires, I decided that I won't be writing about health care reform, school reform, etc. I'm just going to write about vampire reform.

What we do not realize is that this country currently has a shortage of vampire slayers. Often times they end up dead in some back alley somewhere, and they are almost always in their 20s. The average Joe might assume the poor slayer was a druggie who died of a drug overdose. They are often degraded and posthumously thought to be irresponsible adults. But that is only because no one ever thinks to check for vampire bites. Slayers have short life spans (for obvious reasons), and so there is a high turnover rate and a perpetual shortage. This is the biggest threat to America right now. Without trained vampire hunters, how can we ever hope to be safe in our beds? The vampires will surely take over the country before long!

Our most famous vampire hunter, Abraham Lincoln, was obviously an outlier. He survived well into middle age. And he was responsible for the biggest mass vampire slaying (during the Civil War) ever. He will always be remembered for his courage in battling the vampires who lived in the Southern states and would feed on plantation slaves. Thank God for the freeing of those slaves. To be sold to vampires as a midnight snack or dinner was a far worse fate than any other they could endure. Lincoln will always be remembered as our longest surviving and most influential vampire hunter.

 But currently, we have another famous slayer. He is the professional vampire hunter, Barack Obama. He is the first vampire hunter since Lincoln to survive into middle age and to become a president. Bravo Mr. President. Bravo. No longer able to feed on slaves, the vampires often abduct innocent children to feed on. But more recently, they caused a giant fungal meningitis outbreak when they attacked steroid recipients receiving their injections and thereby transmitted a deadly fungus, found only on the fangs of vampires, to the patients. The news blames it on faulty hygiene concerning the injections. But all educated people on the topic know the truth...these people died of a vampire attack. And our most famous hunter, who is one of the last greats, is too busy in office to slay these savages.

So please, regardless of who you vote for, just remember that vampires are our biggest issue as a nation right now. It is no longer enough to have our presidents serving as our vampire hunters. From what I understand, Mitt Romney has been training extensively with wooden stakes and a mighty battle axe, but what about the average American? It's not about what your country can do for you. It is about what you can do for your country! Fight the good fight! Make plenty of wooden stakes. Chop some wood so you can get the feel of an axe slicing into something. We all need to get involved and rid this country of vampires and their meningitis outbreaks and other catastrophes.

Thank you all soo much for listening.

Yoga :)

It's been a while since I wrote on here (didn't think there was too much interesting to say...keyboarding is so much different than putting a pen to paper. It's a different kind of thought process.).
But just for kicks, I am going to write about yoga. I had no idea how effective yoga can be. Where has it been all my life! I have tried yoga videos in the past, and I found myself to be too unwieldly to manage it. I am so clumsy and inflexible and could never get past much more than 20 minutes of the routines. However, I just checked out a yoga book, and Wow! Somehow, that book made all the difference.  It's called Moving Towards Balance: 8 Weeks of Yoga With Rodney Yee. It provides pictures and instructions on how to complete a different yoga routine every day for 8 weeks. It is really helping with my back pain and flexibility issues. I really think part of the reason it is so effective for me is because it is in book form. I am not trying so hard to follow along with a video and go at that pace. I can stop when I want with the book, I can shorten the routine, I can do it faster, I can listen to music, I can watch TV. It is a whole other yoga experience. I never thought I would end up a yoga fan, but it has helped my neck and shoulder pain so much that I want to do it every night...even when I think I might be too tired to do it. I was so tired last night that I thought I would skip. But I know how much it loosens up my back, so I did it anyhow. It was a good choice :)